Sometimes do you just wake up and long for something? You may not know exactly what but your heart is aching for something and you know that a passion inside of you is stirring.
Well, of course, I feel that this morning.
In my last post I told you I am content and I am enjoying every minute with your mom and no bit of that was a lie and no bit of that has changed.
Life is a puzzle. As we go through it, eventually, pieces start to fit together to form a picture of who you are. Your mom is a huge piece and with her so many other pieces started to come together to make up who I am. The friends I have made through knowing her have become family. The family I have found through her and in her has filled me with love. There are so many babies in my life that I’ve gotten to love and get me excited for having a few of my own.
I’m 23. When you read this I’ll be older, duh, and you’ll probably think I’m an old man and make so many jokes which I’ll deserve because I did it to anyone and everyone older than me.
I’m 23 and not all of the pieces fit. My heart is still longing. For babies, for adventures, maybe for writing a book. There are so many things I know I want to do, such as do travel agent work, but this morning it is the question marks I find standing in my way.
There is something in me that is aching to come out and I know it’s another piece of the puzzle even if I don’t know where it fits.
Is it travelling across the world to go to places like South Africa, Iceland, and Bora Bora? Is it having my first one of you and starting to be a dad, the job I feel most qualified for? Is it something that I’ve never thought of but will give me a whole new perspective on some area of life?
I told you I’ve been content and, believe me, it has been wonderful. I’m a dreamer though who spends so many days thinking of adventures but I haven’t had my head in the clouds for awhile now and at some point a dreamer can’t stay grounded anymore. It isn’t who they are and it’s not the part of him that everyone loves.
So I am going to return to my dreams and I am going to find new pieces of the puzzle to fit into my life and I am going to be the dad I promised I would be not the bitter one I promised never to be.
As for the wisdom I leave for you?
If you’re a dreamer remember this; it’s okay to be grounded from time to time and just live life the way that feels safe and secure without worrying about your next adventure but you can’t stay grounded for too long. Like a bird you need the air beneath your wings and the world a thousand feet below you. Being a dreamer is a wonderful thing, never let anyone convince you that at some point you need to ‘settle down’ or come back down to earth.
Fly high my child (ren) and embrace everything that life has to offer you.
Love you always,